Jeff Russell

Thanks so much for this!

I really liked the reading you gave me. It felt good. And also, I like the "rune feeling" of it. Somehow I feel the Heathen side of it warm and wise. I don't recall exactly how much I told you about my situation last time but either way, I feel that you tapped into the situation really well.

I have a few questions if that is okay, particularly about the first question. I definitely do feel like I am "bottled up" and holding still. I feel stagnant and that I am not moving much. These past weeks I've felt like I've trickled but it is still not a lot of movement. Just like the feeling of depression, like things are stagnant. For me this comes from the fact that my life right now doesn't motivate me a thing and walking it feels "wrong", like I am wasting my time and I don't want to do it. What I am faced with is, what should I do about this feeling. Might it be that I am not in the right place and that is what makes me feel like that or is it that I need to outgrow something are things that I ask myself. I know something is off, and I know that something needs to change but I am stuck with knowing if it is me that needs to change and suck it up with the situation or I need to change the situation into something that is more congenial with me.

when you should be either gathering strength or moving forward, or else "moving" in a way that doesn't actually accomplish what you're after. I'm getting a sense of "hiding" from something rather than either facing it or truly resting/recovering from it.

It is the moving in a way that doesn't actually accomplish what I am after what I find challenging in the extreme. It feels like I am wasting time of doing something with my life that I actually like or enjoy. "or else moving in a way that doesn't actually accomplish what you are after". Is something like that what you mean with the quoted bit?

I want to revisit this more closely later again as I think there is much in here but, even though this was more a brain dump than actual questions I hope it is useful for the conversation.

Moving to Mexico in the way that I am thinking right now, or back when I asked, definitely feels like the easy way forward... What I think I am avoiding is well, just facing life by myself and going back to my parents home, even if it is helpful, shouldn't be from a mindset of getting back in time but with a sense of responsibility. I think that is what the runes are trying to tell me. Here I feel scared, definitely --very-- and the test and lessons that I need to learn I can do them here or there so perhaps that is some of that.