Jeff Russell

Sure thing. Archetypes are a major part of a Jungian understanding of psychology, and folks of a more occult/esoteric bent have also found them tremendously helpful. Basically, an archetype is a pattern that you see over and over again in human psychology, stories, and behavior. Occultists argue that you see them in non-human places as well. These archetypes are very deeply rooted in the subconscious. If you have more of a materialist way of looking at things, you might say they are evolved instincts of the kind evolutionary psychology talks about. If you are more esoterically-minded, you might say that they exist in some state outside of any given human mind where they can be reached by all of them.

So, what does this mean in this situation? It might mean literally the archetypes Jung talked about, or it could mean the kinds of behavior we expect from ourselves and each other in certain roles. Here, since you mentioned being more disciplined financially, that could be linked to "archetypal" (now using the term more loosely) behavior, such as if you're a man, your partner might expect you to provide resources, and financial discipline is seen as part of that. On the other hand, if you're a woman, your partner might see your spending as part of the "frivolous with my money" stereotype some folks have about women partners.

The archetypes don't only have to do with gender roles, and not even every gender-related archetype applies equally to every member of a gender. For example, Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette in King, Warrior, Magician, Lover talk about how each of these four archetypes is an important component of healthy masculinity, but each brings different qualities (and pitfalls) to understanding the world. I've emphasized them here since gender is so likely to have a lot to do with relationship questions.

So, basically, in this reading, it suggests that you, your partner, or both, are in danger of getting caught up in one or more patterns of behavior that feel extremely compelling or even automatic in the moment, but are not to the good of the relationship. An example: have you ever known someone who is interested and engaged with some topic or behavior in private, but belittles it or pretends not to know about it in public because it doesn't fit who they're trying to be in public? Think of a guy who cries during Steel Magnolias but then makes fun of the movie to his guy friends, or a gal who cheers passionately for a football team and then acts like she knows nothing about sports in front of the guys. Those examples aren't perfect, because there's likely a conscious element to them, whereas getting caught up in an archetype is often unconscious. A man who doesn't realize his way of "being masculine" is wrapped up in what his abusive dad was like. A woman whose way of "being feminine" includes nagging and belittling her partner, despite her desire to be fair and rational.

Does this help any?